It was March 2008 when a big change in my life happened. I was still in pain at that time, trying to recall the past relationships I had wherein everything was a failure. I asked myself, what caused the failure or am I a big failure? In every relationship I had, I always try to give the best of what I can be for I was thinking that there might be no tomorrow. Yet, everything I always fantasize about love still didn’t come into reality; not until I met this guy.
Accidentally, while I was browsing on the internet, I entered a chat room. Several private messages popped up my screen but nobody caught my attention. Everyone was sending the same messages, aside from that fact that I don’t believe in internet love affairs. For me, that’s a big no no.
Why should I believe in somebody who I barely know? Not until torpedo_torpeme caught me unaware.
When I saw his message I just smiled. I thought what a name, so “baduy”. Then, I saw his avatar; hmmmm cute -- but everybody can post pictures that is not really them so I started talking to this guy. When I thought of asking if he has his webcam, in less than 10 seconds I saw Mr. Torpedo with his cute smile and cute dimples. From there, I realized life is still fair. Why should I bury myself in pain and agony while others can smile as if life is very easy?
After exchanging stories of our life, I discovered that his brother is actually one of my students. What a great coincidence. This is the time we started sharing more deeper stories of our existence. I learned a lot from him and I hope that he learned from me too. We started exchanging not only private messages on Yahoo but exchanging text messages and phone calls as well. Until one day, we can no longer control our emotions. I was able to set aside my pride and profession. As a college professor, I know many people will disagree and may laugh at me. Several times I thought of turning back but something in me insisted that I should take risks. I thought everything would happen smoothly as what we planned. But it didn’t.
I just found myself crying again, felt that I was cheated. He confessed that he has a girlfriend and that they would get married on December 2008. I suddenly felt numb. I don’t know how to cope up with the situation. I just wanted to release my anger. I invested trust and respect but that I didn’t receive. I started asking why do I have to suffer when all I did is to love this person unconditionally. I wanted to stop our communication but for some reasons I can't. Maybe the craziest thing I did was when I decided to fight for my feelings. Despite the distance and situation because deep inside me I felt that he really love me.
He is just afraid to face the consequence of whatever would be the outcome of his decision. I stooped so low just to make him realize that it is still his life and he has the full control over it. Nobody can dictate what would really make him happy but himself.
We decided to continue communicating, hoping that one day everything will be okay but it is not always easy. Until I thought of giving up. I felt it is useless to fight for someone who doesn’t want to fight for what is right for him. So I decided to call it quits between the two of us. He refused. He asked me if I could give him time to ask for his father's blessing, an offer I cannot refuse.
I was at the christening of my niece. When I was at the church, I really prayed with all my heart that God would give me a sign -- if I’ll still go on with the relationship or not. We were going to the reception when my phone rung. I thought it was him but to my surprise it's his father giving his blessing. It was an answered prayer. From then on we started building a new beginning, our own dreams but still life isn’t always easy, as we go along our relationship we still encountered difficulties and trials that tested our strength. At some point, I almost gave up.
After the long wait, on November 26, 2008, Flight EK 334, it was almost 12 midnight when I saw the man who’ll complete my life coming out of the airport. I cannot explain how I felt. I don’t know if I was nervous or excited. When we're exactly in front of each other we just found our self braced in each others arms. Then I felt the happiness I always wanted. The contentment I wanted to achieve. We spent our first Christmas and New Year together. It was the happiest Christmas I experienced. On January 09, 2009, we exchanged our vows and I officially became MRS. JAYSON GARCIA and had our happy ending.
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